Thursday, May 14, 2015

Life Stuff

Recovering from a mental wound is very similar to recovering from physical injuries.  It hurts like hell for forever, and then slowly starts to improve, with lots of fits and starts.  Then, once the initial wound is largely put back together, there's lots of time with physical therapy.  You push the boundaries slowly, and it hurts along the way and has lots of backlashes against the pain of physical therapy, until eventually things get strong and working again.

A lot of the day-to-day pain is gone or lesser now, so it would seem I'm in the physical therapy mode now.  Having a job again is pushing my boundaries a lot, and other things, too, like the traveling I've been doing recently and trying to make myself into a better melee commander and rapier fighter/teacher/coordinator/marshal.  Oh, and my car broke for over a week, which was super stressful, and looks like something was put back incorrectly so it will need to go back into the shop soon.  So, more stress.

I'm exhausted, and having breakdowns.  I feel like there's too much on my plate right now.  I'm taking on more again, and overall accomplishing more than I've been able to, but I'm also paying the price for it.  I have to keep reminding myself that this, too, will improve with time.  That this is part of the process.

I haven't done any leatherworking in over two weeks, and I hate that.  I have two commissions, waiting to be worked on, and I usually try to be more on top of those.  I'm hoping I can get to them tomorrow, this weekend, or next week.  Wait, I actually have four commissions, if you include the two for Mom, which I keep forgetting about.  Sorry, Mom... I love you!

Blogging is something that I have loved doing, so much, for the past 15 months.  I definitely want to keep doing it, and don't want to break my twice-a-week deadline as much as possible.  But I might end up taking lots of impromptu breaks from blogging this summer, as I get used to having more responsibility in my life again, and the backlash that goes along with that, until I get stronger.  As I deal with all of the grieving anniversaries that summer always brings, and my mood stability worsens anyway.

I'm taking one of those breaks now.  I'm taking a mental health vacation from blogging for the next two weeks.  I'll check in with something at the beginning of June, and see how things are going.

Recovery is hard, and takes tons of time.  Just because you can't see my wounds - I can't point to a physical scar or a cast or anything - doesn't make that less true.  I have to keep repeating this to myself, too, to remind myself of this.  Recovery is hard.
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Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Garden Spring 2015!


My garden gets me ridiculously excited on a regular basis.  I just have to share how awesome this is!  These first two pictures are from a couple months ago, right after the snow melted.  The spinach plants from last fall survived the winter!


Now contrast that to what those spinach plants look like now.  I had no idea spinach could get so big!  I also finally added the chicken wire on this part of the garden, and opened up the corner plot so the garden could just wrap around the corner of the house in one big piece.


Holy spinach, Batman!  I eat a large salad off these plants every couple days, and they are still this huge.  They just keep getting taller!  And I have both male and female plants, so I'm going to get seeds this year!  *excitement*  Self-perpetuating wonderfulness!


LOOK AT ALL THE BABY KALE!  *coos*  I'm going to make you into so many tasty soups...


The garden wraps around the back of the house (where it originally started last year - I added the side garden last fall).


A couple more spinach plants from last year!  And some kale that also started growing immediately when the snow melted.  You can't see it, but there's a bunch of sage plants growing behind the kale.


These handful of kale plants were from last year, and now they are flowering!  More seeds to perpetuate the garden next year!!!  =D


A bunch of arugula on the right, and some more spinach... When I planted this spinach, I had no idea the other ones would get SO HUGE.  Not sure I need these other spinach plants now... perhaps I'll plants more arugula than spinach next time.  We'll see how they grow throughout the summer!  There's also parsley up against the chicken wire.


More spinach, along with rosemary, horseradish, and thyme.  


Mmmm, rosemary... can't wait for these plants to get a little bigger, so I can start cooking with them.  This area will also be home to all the tomato plants.  I will hopefully be planting those within the next week or two, in and around the spinach.  I'm told the spinach plants will die off in the middle of the summer, when the tomato plants are starting to get larger.  


Chives!  I never really understood chives.  While tasty, onions just seemed better.  Then I put them in a salad with the spinach, and it's wonderful!  Fresh spinach and chives, with roasted beets, olive oil, and balsamic vinegar... that's been about 1/4 of my meals the last few weeks.  Yum yum!

And yes, that's a bunch of weeds around the chives.  Whatever.  The food is growing, and I know what's what, so I don't worry a ton about weeding - I just do a bit now and then, when I feel like it or when they are getting too close to the plants I care about.


Growing my own food just makes me happy.  It's so easy, too!  I put 10-20 minutes of work into the garden, twice a week (watering it and pulling a couple weeds).  Really low-maintenance, and delicious!  I adore being able to walk around my house and pick my food to eat, right then.  And watching the plants explode with growth every few days is fun!  ~Kell
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Monday, May 4, 2015

Happy Fuzzy Yarn!


I've started a temporary part-time job with Happy Fuzzy Yarn this week!  Riin Gill makes truly gorgeous hand-dyed yarn.  I am very excited to work with her, learning more about the yarn dying process and how a small craft business runs.  For some amazing yarn porn, head over to her website and check out how amazing it all is!  I'm going to take the rest of this week off from blogging as I adjust to my new schedule.  I imagine that blog posts will shift from Monday and Thursday to being posted on Tuesday and Thursday for May, so that they are opposite my work days.  See you next Tuesday!
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